Thursday, April 17, 2008

Code blue

What a beautiful morning. I can feel the heat from the sunny window on my face as I look out briefly to take a quick mental break. We haven't had a warm day over 70F in almost 6 months and I am stuck at work. I must walk outside today only to feel the warmth for but a brief moment.
The sound in the background is the ventilator alarming. It's alarming because it is not connected to the patient. The doctors are bagging him with 100% oxygen through his breathing tube. We are in the middle of a code blue in the Surgical ICU. I help by getting a few meds for the administration nurse but mostly watch as the doctors give cpr on the patient's chest. I know he is not going to make it because he is not responding to a big epi dose and he is maxed on 3 pressors. Life is taken granted sometimes by a lot of people. It's been a long time since we've had a code which is good for the patients. But everytime it happens it makes me examine my own life and wonder what would happen to my family if I was no longer around. I am sure they would be fine. It's a thought I don't like to think much about. I am one not to take life for granted. I like to think I am a Tigger and not an eeyore - referring to the one college professor who is stricken with pancreatic cancer and made the Last Lecture. Anyway, I leave the room and a family member is sitting just outside as she sees staff run in and out. Within a couple minutes the code is called (Tuesday Apr 15).

2 comments:

Unknown said...

you're hot, is that picture really of you?...is that your wife?...she's lucky...if you ever have the "urge" email me. You hit my heartstrings the way you blog.

MrMantastic said...

toni, when you going to upload your picture so I can see what you look like? I hope you become a regular!!!! You sound sexxxxxyy.